The mother -in -law is the "supervisor" of the daughter -in -law

Dear Thanh Tam!

My father -in -law has just taken 5 months.My father left suddenly that made everyone in the family and neighbors surprised, so my mother -in -law was psychologically shocked.In the past, every day my parents wrapped tangerines together.He read the newspaper, she picked up vegetables, or both listened to the radio, cooked rice ...

Her biggest concern at that time was him, then two grandchildren, finally the daughter -in -law.The unexpected separation made her disappointed and empty.Now, sometimes she sees her sitting in a mentally missing him and I feel sorry for and feel guilty.

We stayed with our grandparents since we got married, our grandparents helped me to take care of my homes and pick up our children.Although sometimes a bit inconvenient, everything is quite comfortable and I feel very grateful for that.Because of understanding her, no matter what she said, what, I tried to ignore it.But the attitude of "son is the best", "the daughter -in -law is just a durable, devastating eating" that makes me more and more uncomfortable.

My husband works for a foreign company, often working here and there and is given a lot of good seafood and food.The mother -in -law felt proud of that and defaulted in her thoughts: "My husband is the breadwinner, and you are the one."While I am also working in a reputable agency, with equally income.

I discovered this in one time I went to study for my children and her colleague.She said, her mother -in -law whispered to her: "The salary of the water is enough for her to go to school".I felt very warm but then I didn't want to make a fuss, I patiently passed it.

Recently, most of my movements, she reported to her husband.Last month, I was going to replace the Internet because I saw that the transmission line was not fast enough, girls studying online were "jerked".

Just talking to his mother -in -law in the morning, in the afternoon, he saw his husband calling from Ho Chi Minh City: "I just wait for you to come back and determine, this let me worry!".I was still not understanding, then my husband said: "I know my friend about the network, let me find out the information carefully and handle it. I am afraid I'm not understanding and doing wrong so I call you already!".

I was going to change the ceiling lights, was excited to see some types and consult her, she said: "Wait for your husband to come back and determine, know what to refer, and then costly!".From big to small, I felt that she did not trust me to decide what, because in her mind, I was a devastating food.

Normally, when you cook rice, she will sit and play with him.But now, she stood beside and directed: "You have to do this, what do you do!", "There is this small thing and do not make souls!" ...

When I teach my children to study, sometimes my mother did not understand each other, I wrote bad letters, the wrongness, I frustratedly scolded.Do not understand where my mother -in -law came from: "Why teach it so much, how to learn it! Let me tell my father, stop it!" ... At that time, I was angry: "You go out outGo to my children to teach me ".

My husband came back and we had a tense arguing.My mother -in -law ran in, not even said: "Your father just left, you guys were rebellious? If you can't stay togetherdivorceGo, I agree! "... I don't know how to describe my feelings now ...

Phuong Thuy(Hanoi)

Hello!

I am a good and knowledgeable bride.I understand and sympathize with my mother -in -law about the pain she has just experienced.However, living in restraint and not understanding, sympathy for each other is difficult.I can ask my husband to support my mother, just comfort my mother and to troubleshoot my mother -in -lawdaughter -in -law.

On your side, always openly talk to your husband about all intentions for your family.I can also confide in my mother -in -law about everything.She believed she would have a different view of the couple and change the way of behavior, I will no longer be warm.